Wedding Traditions (4-1-1)

Earlier today I was skimming through various wedding related articles and found one from ‘The Knot’ about wedding traditions.  This one was of particular interest in regards to your wedding day photography.

Old School: You shouldn't see each other until the ceremony

New Rule: Schedule a "first look" photo shoot (you and your groom meet with just the photographer before the ceremony). This frees up more time after the ceremony so you can actually enjoy your cocktail hour, and it also lets you spend a few precious moments with your soon-to-be spouse before all the wedding craziness sets in. (Trust us; it will!)

You can see the entire article by clicking on this link:  The Knot – 10 Wedding Traditions.

                       (Photo found online – Queen Alexandra in her wedding dress and veil) 

Many of the couples who hire us, opt to do their photos before the wedding and having a reveal – in front of the camera or in private.  There are still a few who tell me “It’s bad luck” and wait until after the ceremony – we work with YOUR schedule!  However, I still want to share how this tradition came about.

Long ago – back in the day of pre-arranged marriages, the bride and groom more often than not, never saw each other before the wedding ceremony.  The bride wore veils covering her face during the ceremony until that first kiss sealing their marriage.  If a groom were to see the bride and not show up, this often caused a war between the families, nations, etc.  This is why it was deemed as ‘bad luck’ for the couple to see each before the wedding!  Not really the most romantic thought knowing that it was because of fear that if the groom would see his bride, not like the looks of her and then bolt!

 Even when couples were acquainted before they married, it was still considered bad luck for the groom to glimpse the bride pre-ceremony, as she would not be pure and new. Nor was the bride  to see herself as it was believed that if she saw her reflection she would leave some of herself behind in the mirror. 

Contributed by Puget Sound Wedding Professional, Monica of Family Affair Photography

A bride’s best accessory is …

… a beautiful headpiece?  Fabulous jewelry?  Nope.  A bride’s best accessory is a well dressed groom!

You’ve gotten the perfect dress, but what is your man going to wear so he doesn’t look like the bartender at the reception instead of the groom?

If you’re wearing a short or tea length dress a tuxedo or dark very classy suit worn with an elegant tie would be a nice compliment to your outfit.  Your groom could opt for a standard length tuxedo in a variety of colors if your gown has either a cathedral, chapel or sweep train.  A shirt, vest and tie in the same color as your dress has a distinctly “groomish” look.  Maybe it’s time for him to learn how to tie a bowtie.  Brad Pitt, George Clooney and Kanye West all wear them.  A cathedral train can also be worn with tails.  A tailcoat, properly fitted makes a man appear taller and slimmer.

Whatever look you settle on a good fit and an elegant style are always in fashion.

Contributed by Puget Sound Wedding Professional Member Barb of Top Hat Formal Wear

Six Reasons Your Clients Might Not Take a Vendor's Advice on Hiring a Wedding Coordinator.

We've all been there when we have a client who says they have a friend who is caterer or a DJ, their brother has his own band, or someone they know will be really good at taking their pictures.  With Day-of Coordinations this is more typical.  You get what you get when it comes to the bride's mixture of vendors.  Nothing is likely to change even though you see the recipe for a disaster and warnings often fall on deaf ears.  (Put this in your contract!)

I cringe when I know there isn't going to be a professional DJ to work with as well as other professionals.  I hear from the professionals all the time that they have told their client that they need a wedding coordinator.  When I recently asked a very talented DJ how often they had a wedding where there was a professional Wedding Coordinator, he said it was about 1 in 10.  He said that usually a mother will take care of all the planning.  These wedding professionals love having a professional Wedding Coordinator as much as we love working with other professionals.  It helps all of us do our jobs the way we prefer to do them and stay within our areas of expertise.  We all want to make each other look good!

So, this is what I get from all of this.  Wedding Coordinators must find ways to help these vendors who know what they're talking about, change their client's mindset to ever be comfortable enough to hire a wedding coordinator.  I see that this task is one that Wedding Coordinators must take on to help other vendors who want to refer us.

I would love it if anyone would add to my list of ideas to help vendors promote a Wedding Coordinator or a list of reasons you believe a wedding coordinator is such a hard concept to "sell".

Possible myths they will run into:

1.  Wedding Coordinators are only for "rich" people.

2.  Wedding Coordinators are snobs!

3.  Wedding Coordinators are just like the ones you see in the movies.

4.  Wedding Coordinators take over your whole wedding.

5.  The person at the venue is taking care of everything.  

6.  You can find all of your vendors at a show.  (Maybe if all vendors participated in every show and you really got to know them in that type of environment.)  What if a bride hates crowds?  

Possible answers to those myths and misconceptions:

1.  Wedding Coordinators save by way of passing on discounts to clients that the vendors give to them knowing that their job is going to be easier than if they didn't have a coordinator.  Coordinators save vendors time!

2.  Most Wedding Coordinators do what they do because they love to help people.

3.  Being a Wedding Coordinator is a lot of really hard work.  There's nothing glamorous about finding out that the city employee didn't open up the restrooms, graffiti appeared overnight, you're going over the floor with a lint roller to pick up confetti or glitter so that the client gets their deposit back.  Like in the movies?  Hardly!

4.  A good Wedding Coordinator will listen above all else to what a bride envisions no matter how hard it is for her to convey her dream wedding.  Wedding Coordinators are thrilled when they hear the words, "This is just the way I saw it in my mind, but I just didn't know how to make it happen!"

5.  People at a venue even like it when a professional Wedding Coordinator is onsite so they can take care of their staff and venue responsibilities.  The venue contact person cannot read a client or be counted to catch the bride's glance in their direction every time she needs something.  If brides only knew how busy these venue coordinators and their staff were for an event, they would understand.

6.  A Wedding Coordinator spends a lot of time getting to know vendors and the quality of their work.  The same is true for studying venues.  We want to know what will match the bride's style, personality and budget.

Most Wedding Coordinators give at least some amount of time in the form of a free consultation.

I never have a consultation without hearing a bride, groom or their family members say, "I never would have thought about that!"  What pains me the most, is knowing that I could be helping people have a much less painful, less time-consuming role in planning their wedding and not be completely tired out on their wedding day, along with their family and friends!

As always, wishing you the greatest of days!

Contributed by Puget Sound Wedding Professional Member Janis Flagg of Greatest of Days Event & Wedding Planning.